"I'm Bisexual because men have always hurt me. They have always used me, AND something bad happened to me when I was little." A young girl stated. She was about 17 years old.
"Do you mind me asking what happen?" I asked.
"My brother molested me when we were younger and threatened to kill me if I told our parents. I've been date raped before too. I've never been any guys number one. I've just had a lot of guys treat me bad, so I've decided to become bisexual."
"Well girls are just as capable as boys are to do those things to you. With exception of rape, I think." I said in reply to this young girl.
"I just want a guy to worship me, I want to be it." She said.
"If you wait long enough he will come." I said. How do you encourage a girl that will spill all her junk in the first hour of meeting you. I didn't get it. Choosing to swing both ways was just as easy as choosing to change her underware, it seemed. I don't want to discount the things that have happened to her and maybe if they had happened to me I would be bisexual right now too. So I decided to ask her if she has had any girlfriends since deciding to be bisexual. She said that she was looking into a potential girlfriend. But most of the night she was talking about how hot this one guy is or how hot this other guy is, and she seemed so confused. I was sad for her.
In the time I got to talk to this girl I also got to meet this guy who was 19 and was gay. He was and odd guy and he had really long hair, and really long fingernails, but everything else was pretty masculine. The subject of first loves came up and he had one at one time, his first loves name was Rusty. I had asked him if his first love had been a man or a woman, to which he replied that it was a man and that he never remembers being attracted to girls. Execpt one and this was back in 6th grade. This guy would just talk and talk, and it didn't matter what he would talk about, he could talk about anything. I just listen and I asked lots of questions and I tried not to zone out. I wanted to be attentive. I was just trying to do the God thing in my first encounter with a gay person since I have seen the movie "Rent". The thing was I thought that these guys were neat and weird. I didn't know what else to do besides listen. Which in some cases is the best thing to do. I was not trying to be the religious judgmental person. I wanted them to leave knowing the love of Christ. I hope that they did, I hope that I was a good influence on them, and especially on that girl. In spending time with these people at this party I went to I also saw the importance of staying close to God. There are a lot of things you can be exposed to when you hang out with people that don't know the Lord. And this was a safe party not drugs or boose involved. I just prayed the best that I knew how and listened as much as i could and hoped that there would be clarity to the confusion they were living in. We are called to be lights in this dark world.
3 comments:
wow steve! thank you for posting this and so honestly. it would have been so easy for you to just put a glossy sheen over the story and say how easy it was to love on these two, but that's the catch about love, it is hard and confusing. there is a lot out there about just loving people, which i very much ascribe to, but the practical application is difficult when you have a scenario where a girl has been hurt but finds it very easy to tell a complete stranger her pain and also to choose a lifestyle that in all honesty is very appealing to guys in a girl. it is difficult to not question someones motives, but sometimes they seem so apparent. i don't know, kinda rambling. i am just pleased that you chose to post this but more importantly you chose to engage these people, who god loves, and in so doing, love them. sometimes you never feel the love you decide to show.
i don't know if you have been following the discussion that sean posted about at http://www.whatischurch.com/mustardseed/
but recently someone has posted a link to a gay christian website, i don't know if they were honestly reaching out to loving brothers or if they were trying to kinda be subversive? anyway, the discussion is great and you would have a lot to lend to it.
thank you again for this post, i had a step-brother who was gay, passed away now from AIDS, and he really just wanted people to love him. i hope he met people like you.
sorry mary,
i just assumed it was steve....i didn't read the posted by.
great post!
Hey Brett, Thanks for your post, I will most definitly check out that post on the other blog. It is neat to hear that you had a step brother who was gay and has AIDS because I feel that God has put people like that on my heart and I am trying to learn more about AIDS and figure out what it means to love on Gay people male or female, and I am just trying to learn what I even believe about being Gay. Too bad your step brother isn't alive anymore because I think that it would be a blessing to know him as a person and not just as a gay man with AIDS.
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