Dave's life...

"I am 26 years old and I have lost my faith in humanity. Hope in the human race has gone, skepticism remains. I am 26 years old and I have lost my faith in humanity...I have lost my belief in better times ahead. Is this wrong? Should I keep quite? Should I embrace a political correctness that says better times await us? I cannot do it. I cannot pretend that all is ok. I can no longer pretend that we are not a perverted and misguided bunch mostly because of our lack of insight into our own perversion.

I am 26 years old and I have lost my faith in humanity. Sometimes I see glimpses of reality, in those moments history unfolds and speaks. She slowly gets up from a dusty chair and talks about the way things were. She states that nothing is new, nothing has changed. The young always embrace ideals, from communism to social gospels; if only the world would listen to their fresh ideas. But soon they get older, they read more, they experience more. They realize that nothing is original; nothing escapes the hands of darkness. As they age they quickly embrace the system of trade-offs. Ideals are thrown out because what good are ideals if they lead mankind no where? They trade and barter within the human condition, then they die and leave room for new idealists who keep the pendulum swinging back and forth, from liberal to conservative, from communist to capitalist, from atheist to theist.

I am 26 years old and I have lost my faith in humanity. I can no longer watch the young attribute quick fixes to ancient problems; I can no longer watch the old give in to hedonism because their generational quick fixes did not provide answers to the ancient problems. But, however, in contention, in reality, in conclusion: I am 26 years old and I have lost my faith in humanity because I am human and I am the problem. I am sick...dying you could say. I am dying from the weight of my own conscience; a conscience that knows I cannot do the good I preach; a conscience that knows I live a lie like the rest. I am the personification of a misrepresentation. I constantly pretend to be that which I'm not in order to grasp the world and make it mine. I live in an ethnocentric spiral that leads not into understanding and clarity but to dream like states where reality eludes me. My problem is no different than the rest; I want the power, I want the control; I! I! I! I want to be God. I want the world to revolve around me. But what a sad reality that is. What a cosmic joke. What perpetual nonsense. But is there an answer to our despair? Is their a revelation waiting in our midst? Saint Paul also asked the same question, "Who will save us from this body of death?" And his answer came to him, as it may to us; but not in the form of beauty or in the shape of a philosophy, but through a bloody and vile cross where God answered Paul...where God met Paul...where God answers us...where God meets us. "Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord (Rom. 7:25)" because I am 26 years old and I have lost my faith in humanity."

This was taken from my brother's website...

The American Church

The Church is the hope of the world, the Church in China is the hope of the world, the Church in Africa is the hope of the world, the Church in Brazil is the hope of the world. I have a hard time saying that the Church in America is the hope of the world. Or I guess you can say believing that we can fulfill our duty as the hope of the world. One time I was at my discipleship group and a lady described her place in her walk as, "Fat, Dumb, and Happy". That is a great way to describe the American Church. But here's the thing, I want to love the American Church. Jesus loves the American Church. I don't think that he looks condescendingly at us and thinks that there is no hope for the American Church. He loves us! He knows that there are American Christians out there that have exposed the dysfunction of the American Church, he knows it because he revealed it to us! He revealed it to us that we might be his messengers and do something about it, not so we could judge our brothers and sisters! I confess that I have done my fair share of judging. (Don't even ask me about how I feel about some of the Christians that come into our coffee shop.) I want to love the American Church! Me, Mary Perkins, through the grace and blood of Jesus, can be the hope of the American Church! (Since I belong to the Church I am also the hope of the world!) God can use me and the people around me to live this life in such a way that the American Church would actually thirst for Jesus instead of look at us as though we have taken this "God-thing" too far. Or maybe God would use us to help them see that he can use ordinary people to do extraordinary things for his name! I pray that I could love the American Church, because the world will know that we are Christians by our love.

Dominion?

I had someone throw the "earth is our God" idea my way the other day, admittedly they had been encouraged in this train of thought by the effects of inebriation...

This concept was one that I had encountered in my college days, and it reminded me of a paper I had written exploring the philosophical axioms required for one to take the stands that the “deep ecology” wing of the environmentalist camp posits.

In order for one to believe that we have a duty to earth itself to protect it and to value it, irrespective of our use for it* one has to assume a few basic axiomatic principles.

Those principles are:

A belief that there is a distinction between humanity and the rest of the universe
A belief in the inherent value of the non-human universe

Without these two truths, the belief in humanity’s responsibility to the rest of creation simply makes no sense. Admittedly, not all people who believe that we bear a duty to creation would cite these two claims as a basis for their belief, but they do so implicitly.

The interesting observations come when we begin to look at the cosmology of those who hold this position; a belief that the entire universe is a result of random processes, which demands that:

There is no distinction between humanity and the rest of the universe as both are results of evolutionary forces, and continue to act according to the pressures those forces apply.
There is no value, in anything!

When we look to the cosmology found in the Bible we find that the assertion that God created the universe without humankind and pronounced it “good,” and then we find that the Creator of this valuable universe then created mankind and mandated humanity to care for the earth and to be responsible for it. The Bible teaches that man was created from the earth, and yet filled with the breathe of God, a part of the created order, and yet a representative of God to that created order. (Check out the title link)

The unfortunate thing is that the non-Christian individual who is caring for the earth lacks the philosophical basis to do so, while the Christian individual who possesses this basis, often simply fails to care for the earth.

*The “wise use” camp, which is where most environmental sentiments come from, states that we have a duty to protect the environment for the sake of human enjoyment of it, and betterment by it.

Tim

His name is Tim. He's always laughing, always smiling, always ready to encourage. Tim committed suicide Sunday april 2nd. How is this possible? didn't i just say he didn't have a problem in the world? How was this not forseen? were there any leads to this tragedy. Maybe i should ask, who began the neglect, or the abuse, or who refused to, "consider others before themselves". I have very strong convictions when it comes to listening to people. When somone begins to speak, open your ears and heart, and close your lips and point of view for a season. LISTEN! Allow your Jesus eyes to pierce through the humanity of insecurities and pride of opinion. Even you'll be blessed. The point i am trying to make is that people (priceless and at the same time bought at the highest price) are more important than our own lives. I saw Tim the day he gave up on people. He approached me in the church parking lot, rather disturbed. He said, " hey man I've been trying to get a hold of you why haven't you called me back?" I said," oh Tim i'm sorry i haven't called. I've been really busy lately. How are you?" He said he was OK but something wasn't OK. I didn't consider Tim as more important than myself or my agenda. Rather, i judged him. Asking myself, "why wasn't he in church today, and what is he doing wandering around in the church parking lot, and no I don't have any gas money for your beer breath." All irrational thoughts and opinions based on performance or lets even say, "THE LAW"! My heart is not abiding in and resembling the son of God. God changes hearts and molds people into his image. Not my tactical and so called concern for the itegrity and faithfullness to my selfish people pleasing motives. TO BE CONTINUED.....

Jesus v the Cross

Is Jesus the center of history, or is the Cross?

Community

Steve asked me to talk about community. What spurred this on is the fact that I live in a house with 4 other women, it used to be 5 other women. Let me tell you a little bit about this house. It started last year officially in August my commitment began. The house I live in is called The Girl's House and all 6 of us just desired more of God in our lives. It was the weirdest thing because I felt like I was supposed to live with Jessica, and we prayed about living in this apartment together and we both felt like it was God and the door totally shut. We didn't get it. It was a total yes. At the same time Juniper and I thought it would be fun to start another Girl's House. (We had one at the church a few years back for a summer and all the girls that lived there quit their jobs for the summer and just served Jesus in community) I kinda felt like I was supposed to with Juniper and also with this girl named Rachel. Rachel live in San Luis Obispo at the time as was currently getting ready to move to Redding to be with Sean and Linda for their Santa Cruz church plant. Well long story short: Juniper, Jessica, Rachel, along with 2 other girls Jenn and Lisa, and myself got blessed with this amazing house and great location by the Church and the Coffee Shop, and it was all from God. We had a vision set in place, to be women who changed the world through the love of Christ and the disciplines of the soul. The house was on it's way! It has been an amazing journey so far, we are just three and a half months shy of our commitment being up. We have had our good times for sure and we've had our bad times, but it has been amazing, and our bad times haven't even been all that bad. They are actually quite humorous.
Let me tell you though it is hard being in community all the time, between Yaks and the Girl's House, your home is a community and there is no escape. There is no where to go, where you don't always have to do the God thing. You can choose to do the wrong thing but you better have your repentance quick on your heals. It's been good to see the quality of my character in all of this. It has been good to see that there are things that I want and desire in my life and in my walk with God, then seeing that really I can't achieve those things apart from him. When you are going to move into community you think that certain things are going to take place in you, like the minute you move in you will start to exercise, or you will be able to start waking up at 5 to spend time with God every day. Those things that I thought would immediately happen didn't, and it has taken almost the entire year of living there to get those things in place. It has been good to live there because as weird as it sounds, you get to die to yourself every day. You get to think about others, but it is one of those things that has not been easy, I can say that most of the time I think of myself only, but God has worked something out.
It's wonderful living in a house full of Christians, because you don't have to worry about them bringing in something weird or demonic. You have 5 sisters available to pray you through things, you have 5 sisters to cry on and to share your problems with and they are faithful to listen to you. You have 5 sisters to kick you in the butt when you have a crappy attitude. You have 5 sisters that you get to pray with. You have 5 sisters that share your passion and your fire for God and that is the most exciting thing ever!
If I could do things different in the Girl's House than I have done, I would have been more submissive to the house leader instead of bucking the system, when the things that I was bucking were the things that I had desired. It's weird how sinners work. I would have served my sisters more. I think that I also would have been more transparent with them, I don't know what that really looks like. But the goodnews is I have 3 and a half more months to do the things that I could have done better. This Girl's House and Yaks have been the most amazing things in my life thus far and I can't wait to see what else God has for me when I get to do community in a different setting: Buffalo, New York!

Who is Jesus?

who is Jesus?

I am thinking about Jesus and who is he to me... is he my personal savior to whom I take my shopping list of prayers to be answered? ...after he has answered all of my prayers the way that I would like then I will have a painfree, void of suffering lifetime of happiness. Is he my friend to whom I turn to only when life brings about a desperation in which nothing else seems appropriate to turn to? When the desperate circumstances are gone, so is the need to be with him and consult him? Is he the Lord of my life on Sundays, but monday thru saturday belong to me?

In pondering who Jesus is, I have come to the conclusion that Jesus has been all of the above many times in my life since deciding to follow him and that disgusts me. I know all the right things to say about who Jesus is, but I find myself seeking an answer (in my heart of hearts) who is Jesus to me? Do I really know him at all? Whoah, maybe I just lost my salvation but at least I am honest, I can not claim to know him as intimately as I know others in my life yet I don't claim to serve others, I claim to serve him. Do I serve a God I don't know and if so why? Is it the lucrative promise of heaven or the fear of hell?

These are just the thoughts that are circling around in my melon these days, I long to serve Jesus in a manner worthy of the God that he is and only in intimately seeking his heart will I be able to thrust myself forward into his passions, and someday hope that his passions that have taken up battle with mine will win the war.

I know in my heart of hearts that I do know Jesus and each day I come to know him better however, I know I desire more. I know that many of his passions have won over mine but there are still more to go. I want to make sure that as I follow Christ I am truly following him and not a religion or a set of rules but instead the passionate heart of God. I want to know him and follow him in such a way as to transform the world I live in with his LOVE, that people could not deny Christ because they see him flowing out of me, instead of seeing so much of me flowing out of myself that people are hardpressed to find even a glimmer of God.

The Church Catholic

I have had the conversation with several of you, and have read several authors who point to this truth:

The Church is not me, nor is it my local community, nor is it all of the communities of faith in my city or country; it is all of those who have chosen to participate in Christ in every culture since Jesus walked among us. This means that I do not speak for the Church (in one sense, it is vital that I do speak for the Church*), nor does my local community, etc, etc. We who desire to keep in step with the Spirit, must hear his voice as it echoes forth from all our brothers and sisters throughout the earth and throughout the centuries. We must hear from the African slaves of the 1700’s, the Chinese underground church of today, the early Greek fathers, the Sudanese in conflict with muslims, the American addicts and the European scholars. The whole church must speak to the issues that face it, in both its global and local expressions.

This is most evident for me in the affluent and decadent slumber of the American Christian, who quite ignorantly believes himself or herself to be “middle class.” The young men and women of our churches who honestly believe God desires them to be “comfortable.” Our young prophets and apostles languish away in schools, saddling themselves with decades of debt, selling themselves for the American Dream that keeps them from even knowing that God has dreamt dreams for them. We would give a young woman all of the material wealth and comfort that her mother never had, and in the end she will find herself empty. We will tell our young men to go to a university to get “educated” and to “better themselves,” and yet they will be slaves to a church culture that tells them to pursue comfort at any cost, pursue a 401K, God wants to “bless” you.

All of this falls away the moment an honest heart steps foot in a second world country (we won’t even mention the third world). As women and men indwelt with the Spirit of the Compassion of God, we won’t be able to return to our cars, and jobs, and houses, and schools.

It is this aspect of the whole church speaking to the whole church that I believe holds the way forward for the Church in America, and perhaps in other parts of the world. I am less familiar with the perils of Chinese Church culture, however, familiar enough to know that they need our biblical understanding, our educated people; and yet this again is another indictment of our own lack. I truly believe myself “unqualified” when Chinese Christians plant churches (plural) in the first months and even weeks of their salvation. …and this with none of the Judeo-Christian heritage that is our childhood tutor.

*I would never want to take away from the reality that we are members of Christ and all participate in His mission which is the Church. We are all representatives of Christ, but we must be representatives of the global, historical church, not the 21st century Western Church.

Think Before you Speak...

I have had a number of people express a level of concern over my last post...

I am sorry, I can get fired up over some of my pet concepts, this being one of them, and I probably did not communicate what I wanted to with the appropriate tone. I do understand that not everyone is at a place yet where they have moved beyond the "American (Nightmare) Dream;" they still believe that the Gospel is primarily for their benefit; and that we must lovingly encourage them beyond this. Others have legitimate needs and concerns, and are in sincere need of ministry; we must lovingly care for them. My concern was with what I see to be a general misconception, however, it appears that I communicated that in such a way as to provoke personal responses. I apologize for any harsh or inflammatory language. I, too, am a work in progress, Jesus help me...

The Purpose of Church Leadership

I just about lost it... twice!

1) I had someone tell me a story about an individual essentially telling their Pastor that the Church simply wasn't taking care of people well enough.

Whenever we ask, "Why doesn't the church... ?" We are in HERESY! I am the Church, therefore if I think the Church should do something, I should do it! (So it's either heresy or just plain apathy, either way it is sin!)

In light of previous conversations (online and offline) I have to conclude that this results directly from the (faulty) gospel that we preach. Jesus died on a cross so that you could be comfortable?!?!

2) I actually had an individual tell me that they had no concern for Jesus, or his desires for their life; they had prayed the prayer and their "salvation" is assured (the individual actually said, "I'm going to heaven.").

Anyone interested in a deeper and scriptural understanding of the place and function of leadership in the church cannot ignore Greg Ogden's Unfinished business, it is a radical rethinking of church leadership in light of the Bible.

Ogden shows the current American model of Church:

The professional "ministers" are responsible for meeting the needs of the Christians who show up to the respective buildings on a given Sunday.

and the Biblical understanding of Church:

The leaders (where they get their food and shelter from is immaterial to their function as leaders) are responsible for equipping Christians* to minister to those in the world who don't know Jesus.

If we would take this understanding and truly work it out, we would see radical reshaping of our churches take place. The root of this issue is, simply, that as Americans we believe Jesus died on a cross so that we could have an air-conditioned ride to our 40 hour a week job with 401k, health insurance, and vacation fund.

*This is, of course, above and beyond their place as disciples of Jesus, called to love God and minister to the world; their role as leaders is above and beyond their role as disciples and does not negate the character of Christ being formed into them in such areas as compassion, service, evangelism, etc.